Cracking the Whip

I love women, I really do. I love a nice long girlfriend lunch over Cosmos followed by retail therapy at Macy's. Over the years my girlfriends have shared every one of life's milestones, good and bad, have been there to celebrate as well as mourn with me. One of them, my best friend Jersey, literally saved my life after my divorce. So, yes, I adore my women friends and can't imagine my life without them. However, I also need at least one good man friend. Men are so different as friends; they can be brutally honest, have a no-bullshit attitude and little tolerance for the drama we women so often feed upon. They don't get bent out of shape if they don't hear from you for a while, they are spontaneous and fun-loving, less judgmental and basically just don't give a shit about the silly things we women obsess over day & night. It's refreshing. I find myself able to reveal parts of myself to guy friends that I would never dare do so with women for fear of being judged, perhaps rightly so. Sometimes I don't want to be dissected, I don't want to talk things out til the wee hours of the morning. I just want to sit back with a (light) beer and relax! This is where My Men come in.

Usually these are guys who are otherwise committed so there's no chance of it turning romantic, or we simply aren't attracted to each other, or, they are ex-boyfriends who just make better friends than lovers!For example, I have recently run into any old flame from high school, at Italian cutie who was an absolute sweetheart, treated me like a princess..but the timing was wrong. As Franco says, I already belonged to someone else (uh, that would be Beren) heart & soul and he simply didn't have a chance. But now, from the "safety" of his happily-married life many miles away, we have been able to reconnect on a totally different level, and I am enjoying the hell out of it! While Franco is sensitive, warm & caring, bright & witty and fun, he is still a man..and that, my dears, brings a whole different element to the friendship!

Why am I telling you all this and what does it have to do with weight loss? Because in the sea of fabulous women bloggers who are so supportive of each other, who take that girl-talk into cyberspace, who allow me to bitch & rant & whine and sit right there next to me, nodding and holding my hand, there's another genre of bloggers popping up as well: The Men. Lately I've noticed a surge of male bloggers writing about their weight loss efforts, diligently recording their failures & successes in a way completely different than we women do, and they are fabulous! Honest and funny and often irreverent, these guys have me mesmerized with their words. I sit here howling with laughter, cheering them on, in awe of these big men who are brave enough to get down & dirty with us girls, revealing their struggles with their own body issues in a forum where they are indeed the minority. It's awesome!

Having said that, I've also noticed something different about the male bloggers: they bring that no-nonsense, brutally honest attitude into the blogosphere. While they are incredibly encouraging and supportive of their fellow weight watchin' friends, they also don't hesitate to give a good swift kick in the ass when necessary. Allan is a perfect example of this. He doesn't hesitate to use tough love when he thinks it's necessary and though I myself have been been a "victim" of his wrath, I probably deserve it and would take my punishment willingly. Some of my other favorite guys, Misunderstood and Admired?? Patrick, Mark & Jack, also provide a unique and fresh perspective and I look forward to their posts each day.

Lately I've been turning to my guys more so than my lady friends, in cyber-space as well as real life, because I think I need a big manly dose of reality. I have been screwing around with this weight for so long now and though my girlfriends aren't saying anything, I can feel the frustration coming from the man corner. I know they're dying to give me a big dose of macho advice, would love to tell me to quit my bitchin' and just do something already! Am I right, Allan? *wink*

So, today, even without the kick in the ass, I'm getting freaking serious. Really. No more excuses, no more dawdling. I know, I know, I've said it before and I wouldn't blame you for rolling your eyes and smirking. But I am serious, enough so that I'm going to ask the boys for a favor: If I start to falter, if I come here whining and making excuses, I want you to dole out some of that tough love, ok? Kick me in the ass, crack that whip..do whatever necessary to keep me on track. I can take it, I promise.

Have a Beauty-Full Day,